Friday Night 10.30pm. Where does time go? There have been quite a few changes since I wrote last. I won't bore you all with the details and keep it short 'n ' sweet but it would seem my "whaleness" "waves of depression" and "excruciatingly painful lower back" kinda got me so down, and so uncomfortably sore, I headed straight for the doc's.... outcome? A severely underactive thyroid! hmmmm.
Hence the reason I haven't felt like writing. To be honest, I felt sorry for myself and didn't take It too well that I would have to take tablets every day for the rest of my life but I'm okay with It all now.
I gave myself a good talking to, after a totally unrelated conversation with an 81 year old wonderfully wise lady, whom I've never met, made me realize that there are people far worse of than me, in much worse situations. she told me that she is her husband's sole carer and calmly explained that even though he has had 2 strokes and has to be fed by tubes, said she once had the choice of putting him in a home many years beforehand and she refused outright,
Her words...."When I took my vows almost 60 years ago, " I meant every word". It transpired that her only source of a "break" from her constant caring was her home help, who came round once a week for 2 hours! she said it was "hard" sometimes but she has good day's and bad day's like everyone else! she then finished her conversation by saying "There's not much point in complaining, "It doesn't change anything," "We all just have to get on with it".
That was It. Right there. All it took for me to stop being selfish and realize how well off I am. I didn't get a chance to thank her or even tell her what she had done for me, she was a truly remarkable lady. I won't ever forget her. I feel lucky to have been shown her amazing strength and dedication. xx